zucchini, two ways.

I was formally introduced to chocolate zucchini loaf a couple of years ago. It was a total sneak attack; it looked like chocolate cake and tasted like Nom nom nom but was filled with squash! When I asked what kind of cake it was and the secret ingredient was revealed my life was forever changed.

Wendy brought me a fresh zucchini from her garden, it was huge! She told me that it only takes about a week to grow that big in her garden. I told her I'd bake something and bring it to work. La la la, two weeks it'd been sitting in my fridge before I finally got up the courage to deal with it. I cut and grate it up, resulting in about 4 cups of zukey goodness- which is enough for two recipes of deliciousness. Yes indeed, that makes it a twofer!

While it was hanging out in my fridge it of course was haunting me. I scoured the internet for recipes and came up with about fifty I wanted to try. Earlier this week I quit messing around and decided on zucchini brownies.

Recipe one- Zucchini Brownies. I decided not to stray too far from chocolate zucchini cake as it's such a winning recipe, so this recipe was a perfect fit. Super simple AND they are vegan! The moisture in the zuke makes eggs unnecessary and the fat comes from vegetable oil! As I am a glutton, I sampled an edge piece for breakfast and it was delicious- a little cakier than I like though- perhaps I sifted the flour too much. For an afternoon snack I had a piece cut from the middle of the pan and it was undercooked, fudgey deliciousness. I didn't even bother frosting the brownies and they are still amazing. My taste testing panel all made yummy noises.

Recipe two- Zucchini Banana Loaf. I had a whole bunch of ripe bananas that I'd been procrastinating on baking. I was thinking of doing a basic Zuke loaf but got nervous that it would taste healthy (aka gross), so i found a highly rated recipe with both banana and zucchini! I decided to healthy up the recipe (I had a guilty conscience from eating all those brownies), so I added in extra zucchini and banana, substituted part of the flour for whole wheat and part of the oil for flax oil, and I added in a few table spoons of: ground flax, wheat germ and oat bran, and a cup of chopped walnuts for crunch and protein. Usually making this many substitutions is how i end up with a baking disaster but sometimes i just can't stop myself.

I put the timer on for an hour and had a bath. I got out with plenty of time to spare so i plopped my butt on the floor in front of the stove. My fireplace is still shut off for the summer and apparently I can't be bothered to spend the three minutes it takes to re light the pilot, so my place is a freezing cold ice box. My laziness appalls me but still I make no move to fix it.

While parked on the floor in front of the stove me I was catching up with Smy on bbm and told her what i was baking...

michelle.: My loaves are looking so high!

Smy: Ya. Ohh let's see

michelle.: will opening the oven wreck them?

Smy: No

Smy: Be quick

michelle.: IMG01416-20110929-2017.jpg

Smy: Ooooh

Smy: They r beautiful

michelle.: :d

michelle.: I am sitting in front of the oven watching them grow
michelle.: They are my children
Smy: Hahahahhaha

Smy: Ur deranged :O

michelle.: Hahahahah I am indeed
michelle.: Freshly baked children, hot out of the oven. Yummmo

Smy: Hahahhaa

Smy: Lil chubby babies
Smy: Good for the pokin
michelle.: Sliced up with some butter
michelle.: Nothin like a slice of baby to start the morning right
Smy: Ahaha
Smy: SICKO
michelle.: :)

I took the first loaf out at about 58 min and the second loaf out at 65 minutes as its a much bigger loaf pan. I was being a bit impatient so the loaves are slightly undercooked at the very center, but that's just extra texture, right? I feel pretty happy to have made two good sized, good looking loaves, with not even one disaster during the process. On the way to work this morning I dropped off a few slices to my Great Uncle Ron and brought the rest to work. I'm essentially a mix between Martha Stewart and Santa Clause, minus the magic reindeer and insider trading.
xo.shelly. over and out.

17 Day Diet. Part 1

Periodically since I became a "grown up" I've had a twitch in my right eye. It comes and goes. When it's gone it never even crosses my mind. When it's here it's all I can think about. Horrifyingly, it's been hanging around on and off for the last two weeks. Ugh. I looked it up and it may be caused by: Fatigue or lack of sleep; Over consumption of caffeine; Physical or emotional stress; Anxiety or phobias; Brain damage or other neurological disorders; Eye stress associated with extended viewing of the computer screen; Epilepsy.

I thought long and hard about these potential causes and have decided I must have epilepsy. Darn it! Seriously though, I think it's from this diet that I'm on, and by diet I mean healthy eating plan. The word diet arouses too many negative connotations that I'd rather not arouse.

I jumped on KT's 17 Day Diet bandwagon as that's what I do. I am a bandwagon jumper. Whatever you're doing I want to do it do. Jumping off a bridge? Fine. I'll be there.

Let me give you a run down on the 17 Day Diet. It's a four phase diet, each phase is 17 days. If you fail the first 17 days or are not happy with the results you start from the beginning. The first phase has the most eating restrictions. You are allowed 2 servings of fruits and 2 of probiotics (eg, yogurt) before 2 PM and are allowed unlimited amounts of vegetables and lean protein (eg., chicken or turkey). The next three phases slowly reintroduce other types of fruits, vegetables, proteins and whole grains (in moderation).

I, like most people, love carbs...and by carbs I mean starchy, bready, delicious carbs- bread, oatmeal, pasta. I only eat fruits and vegetables in order to make my plate look pretty. I am on day 4 of the diet. Last night we went for dinner and I spent the entire time staring at my mom's garlic toast and at the pita situated at the far end of the table. A few times I looked to katie for permission to eat the heavenly carbs. She gave me a "go ahead, but i'm not eating any". She doesn't care if I cheat BUT cheating isn't the same if you're doing it solo. Cheating = Failing. On that note, let me tell you of my fails so far... I have had two cups of coffee with cream over the last four days and I probably have had more fruit today than I should have as I was snacking on prunes from my desk drawer to fight off starvation. That's not so bad hey?

I just read an article in Macleans written by Dr. William Davis the author of "Wheat Belly", he claims that eating wheat is making us fat. In his interview with Macleans he states that wheat is addictive and if you 'go off' wheat you will experience unpleasant withdrawal symptoms for about five days. After that your cravings will subside, your calorie intake decreases and your alertness and overall health improve.

So I'm pretty sure the reasons why I feel absolutely terrible, why my eye is twitching and why I can't focus on anything (but thoughts of cheese bread) is because I'm going through withdrawal. Essentially, I am a crack addict for carbs. Fantsic, i'm sure my mom would be so proud! The good news is that as I'm on day 4 of no wheat, by tomorrow or hopefully the day after, I will be FREE from my addiction to wheat. Yippee! FREE AT LAST! *insert jolly jump with heel click here* In the meantime, I'm thinking that the coffee I had after lunch (in hopes it would make my eye twitch and raging headache go away) kind of helped. I feel capable of being less of a raging b*tch now. Hooray!

Stay tuned for more misadventures of Diet Girl, a story of the hunt for healthy.

Michelle of Honor?

This weekend my lovely sister, Amanda, got engaged to my favorite brother-in-law-to-be, Jason! Very exciting. I might have peed a little when I found out. He picked a beautiful ring and proposed on a lovely, romantic weekend. He told us that he had the ring hidden in his tshirt drawer for the last three months. I am more than shocked that manda didn't find it! She's pretty snooptastic.

The wedding planning has commenced with a vengeance. Venues are being researched, the invite list has been made, the dress shopping date set and the bridesmaids and grooms have been selected, although the best man and maid of honor have not been announced yet.

I have great designs on the position of number one bridesmaid, aka Maid of Honor. I was born to do it- stand  around and look pretty, hold flowers and plan a stagette, pfft it's got my name written all over it. Mich the MOH! Its got a nice ring to it, eh?  How could my Twin sister choose anyone but me for that role? We were womb buddies for gods sake! How can the other bridesmaids even compete? Gifts maybe... That's the only way I feel I can lose this MOH race! Not that it is a race, it's a privilege and honor, second to none.

I just know deep in my heart that nobody could MOH my manda like I could. I will MOH the heck out of this wedding! Minus the speech part... I'll blow that for sure!

Let me introduce the bridesmaids (my competition) and their potential MOH winning characteristics:

Lisa- sister, but not a twin. Their sisterly bond has recently been strengthened through a summer of car pooling. She has recent experience being a MOH, potentially giving her seniority.
Sam- Amanda's best friend since elementary school. Knows a good chunk of her deep dark secrets which Sam could use to threaten manda for MOH status. She is a lot nicer to Amanda than I am, is super hot and could beat me to a pulp if she wanted to be the MOH. Also, she made Amanda her first born son's god mother. Amanda kind of owes her.
KT, Jess and Nikita- sorry, but not a chance in the MOH running. No blood relation and Sam has more dirt on manda than all three of you combined. If any of you three get asked to be MOH I am requesting you politely decline and throw in a good word for me. Don't worry, I can send you a list of my positive attributes if you want to keep them on file.

I don't know when manda's announcing who the lucky girl is going to be. I'm kind of hoping it's not super soon so that I have lots of time to practice an acceptance speech. Also, with some extra time I can remind manda how much fun and how perfect I am for the job! Patience is a virtue I do not posess, the anticipation is killing me.

MOH me already!!!